Spirit has been my name for almost 10 years now
Selma is my Bosnian name on Passport
I love SushiI love Ringa too
I love chocolate Mars & milk
When I am happy or sad I eat any of the above or all
I am Socio-Effective Yes I am
A song can make me happy it can also make me sad
A movie is also a mood shifting experience
Dancing is the bestWalking is great
Sports energizes me mostI Love mornings and breakfasts too
A great morning would be playing sports then having breakfast in sunny morning with friends
I fear the Night
When I cry which I rarely do my ears and noes go red
I hate clashes but when there is one it’s most probably a final one
I rarely say No but just lately wont say but NO
I appreciate Data so much
In another Life I would have been a librarian & an actress
Reading, Traveling are both Perfect
I love the sea but I fear it
I love the Nile Felouka in Sunset with friends maybe with a musical instrument is magical
Paintings raise my astonishment
Hand-Made is Beauty
Old is Gold
I don’t belong to this era
I am very spontaneous
I live in Lalala Land
I am too realistic that it is depressing
Too IdealisticI
love all kinds of animals
I love babies
I adore black babies and नो
I sound racist I would have loved to be black with curly hair and blue eyes 2 Things I hate the most Stupidity & arroganceIf is my favorite poemYes I belly dance like ballet danceYes I played the role of a man in a dance in public Yes I acted in pharos outfitYes Played once a role where I said only one sentence and said it wrong I love black, red, white and all colorsI love painting my clothesCats, Gypsies & Witches are roles I want to playGiving Away everything not used is my outmost hobby; applying lean to my personal life On My birthdays friends bear with me singing mostly I begin with Hello and you can imagine the rest I sing horribly not only the words & rhythm I forget I also change them both .Family is a priority.Precious stones & silver fits me the mostI like old buildingsI like downtown specially friday mornings walking aroundI have this look I won Oscar for it makes you feel you want kill yourself lel2asafI also have this look that Would give your life a meaningI have pictures when I am on the phone :-)I feel gifted having a twinI also feel gifted being the youngest among great 2 sistersWhen I enter Ramses College I get scared till नो
I love the feeling of the sand I love the sound of the EaglesI forgive but don’t forgetI love Thomas Mushroom saladLove onions & Garlic as sexy as it might sound Owls have very attractive eyes Yes they doI taught a bird to listen to me (TOM) I scare people out and feel glory in doing so I dont kनो
why and I want to stop itI also Give very bad first impressionsI am not arrogant at least not from inside and dont want to be Modesty is a value I dont want to give उपीf I would pray for something is balance I dont like Sउप erlativesWith Animals I say He, she I dont use ItLove sitting in the flower box in my window looking at the skyRespect Trust & Love are base of a healthy relationshipSimplicity is the mother of beautyThe shortest line between 2 points is a straight लाइन SekSeka, SemSema ,Salameka, Meka, Louma, Spirit that’s simply me

Cabaret Movie Critique

Contaminated with the confusion Factor

What a movie?
In this time of the Year in 2008, I felt exactly like when I was 14 years in my bedroom sleeping at night afraid that the terrorist would come and jump from the window and kill us all. It was the time of the El-Erhaby movie. Yes I felt that way at that time a colleague of mine in school lost her Police dad in a car bomb by a terrorist, my mum (authorized translator) also lost a group of 40 tourists coming from Bosnia when Aswan biggest terrorist action happened.

I was so young didn’t understand much of what’s happening but the newspapers were so turbulent.
To watch that movie now made me feel I am in early 90’s except for a feeling that made the film a master Peace a feeling of Confusion that characterizes each and every moment and each and every place here in Egypt nowadays the 2 extremes living in one person the Confusion.
As for the good and the bad the white and the black doesn’t exist anymore we re the two colors in the same flesh and its totally different then grey
It is so freaky Scary

Yes the Cabaret Owner is a good man Yes he prays yes he doesn’t drink I can totally understand I see him Yes It’s just a job but he Is Good….ehmmmm…. He neither is at least he wants to be and he drinks milk no Women (Neswan as he says) nor drinking for sure no drinking.

Yes Jumana Have no option she is a good Kind hearted. Yes she lives just for her mum and she wants her to go 3omra so much even if she has to strip for that.
She is not bad she simply has no other option!!!! Is it true she has no option is that the society we live in Just for she has no qualifications poor and her gender is a woman …Tears coming down on my Face ….

And here comes the best of all An Oscar winner Donia a beauty with her spontaneous and gestures. You don’t know whether you are supposed to laugh or you cry black comedy painful humiliating what she has to go through in her house in the streets and everywhere Cursed because she is poor beautiful girl with no good family no hug no security no safety that would embrace her.

Bedeir has turned his life course just by a story that I might believe in but sorry it is very weak story that would stop him from 30 years working in Cabaret and choosing to take 75 % less of his salary nowadays.

What about the right and wrong did he really need to listen to that story?
Is he that fragile? Can Faith this holly word and value be changed in 2 minutes?
Was it really strong enough to make him choose the white not the black though the grey seemed appealing for 30 years and he must have heard zillion of similar stories or Oups sorry maybe he can just afford this decision now after his children finished school or college ehmmmm…. Or maybe he feels he will die soon so he d better wash up before death…Oups sorry. Am I bitching here too hard on the man ehmmmm Sorry the truth is painful!!!!!!

And the confusion factor arises again in every character in the movie it was just in the air and as I was moving from my seat in the cinema to the real life, it was hard on me to move for the movie is just a movie that ends by the End

But life is just there all the time and the confusion factor is there all around us contaminated ….filled with pain agony poverty and justifications confusion.

*Confusion from Salma dictionary has meanings that can’t be mentioned in this context for unmentioned रासों

Road to Salvation

It’s been so long I haven’t written I feel like I have been prison and
I think I did everything I had to do to be freed I did a lot ……..
I have it all.........
Having this blush and the light in the eyes …everything beautiful
I have got it all to get free ….. But still I am in prison and the pity is that I need just a half step

Why not yet taken??
What stops me??
What paralyzes me??

I have got no idea……But it wrinkles…………………………… it annoys me so much

You only know yourself when you go beyond your लिमिट्स
Still
Being No one means I can be everything I had ever dreamed of

Paradigm Shift

Life 101

:-)Life 101
Leaving an impact , Making a Difference, MADE ME ALIVE
xxxxx

Searching Serenity

There was a time When I Was a dreamer of dreams.
But now I am a lover of realities.
Too busy, dull fake we run and run but what for? , what after?
We look for love we run for a better work for money …we always seek to be better ….but what is better?
What about Faith? What about our inner soul? Our rights & believes?
What about leaving an impact? Is it a luxury nowadays?
Do we only seek survival, the basic needs & desires to be fulfilled and then die, Is that our mission on earth?!!!!!!
Very often, human beings observe something but do not give importance to it. But if you give importance to God's Love & concern, you will feel the results in your life of aspiration. What we actually want is love, light and truth YES IT TURNED TO BE AS SIMPLE AS THIS so let us pay all attention to them things and ignore everything else that takes us away from our real life.
We want to become a long-distance runner. While we are running, the goal seems far away and we want to reach it in the flash of an eye. But if we do not put a limit on the amount of time it should take us to reach our goal, if we don't bind it, then the light will fade, when we do reach the Goal we have to know it is the realization of our patience.
Tenderness, warmth, love in me, through me and for me ....
I will live to be and to do for such a gift that has been given by You.

Past Years Reflection

(Bad taste gets the best out of Her)
Ehmmm and when were you ever happy?
I can’t remember I forgot ….Ehmmm well years ago …………
And did you ever feel safe?
I am not sure I ever knew the meaning and just when I did understand it, I never felt it
And did anyone ever know you?
Long time ago someone did pay an effort…………….
Lonely I am for almost 2 years…………
Bitterness never felt worse for not being appreciated for the cheapness for the whole story
For being so lonely while surrounded with a vague poker face …………
I have learned a lot to which I am so thankful A grown up emotional lady enlightened with facts feelings realizations is born
Bitterness for the pain she caused and wish any would understand that can’t be described and the pain she will cause that future will write about…………………..
I have never asked for help I have been always the tough strong smart good girl

Now I am the weak Lady May God Bless me.

Searching for Serenity and peace
I need Your help
Yes I do

In surprise with no Attention nor Introduction

Silence deep silence In agony in silence in surprise with no attention nor introduction
I once heard a story straight from the heart About a girl and how her world began to fall apart It all started when she met the boy that made her life complete Just thinking of him made her heart skip a beat
They were the couple everyone wanted to be As the weeks passed they fell more in love and were less aware Of how often life turns out to be one day She met him, it was like a sign, he was so the one, together they fell, in deep love real fast, vowed to love each other, that they'd always last, then it got stronger, deeper than thought, she'd love her forever, felt life was to short, then something went wrong, and they spent less time, the girl started to wonder, is he even still mine, till one days he called, and here s what he said, "I d rather be alone, then with u instead, from that day on, inside more she died, she couldn't let go, no matter how hard she tried, two and a half days have passed, in life she feels he has no part,…… As the days passed by she became more and more aware About how it’s ok life's unfair Because eventually everything becomes your past But your memories will always last ...............................................................

In an attempt to alter truth

In an attempt to alter truth to live it and seek it she always dreamt you be the light she sees by, to speak through your voice, and …. A lot that can’t be explained...........

She kept her dreams out of fear for they are tale stories; till she believed herself she believed the lie the fear. The mask was the product and she …….She became the mask she s wearing!!

Living alone in her world with the mask alone with everything but with nothing.
With her music, books and writing made it up for the words and experiences gave hope of other lives that can be lived, shades of hope, a taste of new blends, far away sparks ……

Scared she was for couldn’t believe it you are there to the extent of denial scared, for it was too much to bear :-)

You were darkness once, but now you are the light.
Even when you feel most alone, I am there.
Even in your fears, I am there.
Even in your pain, I am there.
I am in you, and you are in me.
I am your peace. I am ONE with you. I am.

Only in absolute stillness, beyond self, can you know me as I AM, as a feeling and a faith.
I am here, I hear, I answer, I listen, I l....
When you need ME, I am there.